A woman named Gina e-mailed The Unnecesarean with a story and said, “I hope you can use this.” I wrote back and said, “Women like you are the reason for this site.”
Gina told her VBAC story on her blog, The Feminist Breeder. It’s very long, so I hoped to summarize it for those of you who are not birth junkies and probably will not spend ten minutes to read a birth story. It’s really well written, though.
Here is the cast of characters in order of appearance and a few plot spoilers:
Baby Jules (still swimming)
The Mucous Plug
Gina’s Husband, John
The Reluctant Cabbie
The Pain So Strong That It Can Be Anthropomorphized Into a Character
The Anesthesiologist (Ahhhhh)
[Intermission- Hospital Staff Change]
The New Resident, Who Told Gina That She Was Never at 7 cm Like The Previous Resident Told Her AND That She Probably Just Couldn’t Ever Get Past 5 cm (Huh?) and Dropped Some Additional Fear Bombs
[Sadness, fear and panic ensue]
[Gina regroups overnight with Baby Jules]
Enter “The Nurse with the PowerPoint Presentation of Dead Babies” (Not really. Close enough, though.)
“I got pissed. I couldn’t believe this woman just tried to throw a “dead baby” scenario in my face, especially when nobody is in any danger. John could tell I was getting really upset again (who wouldn’t?) and he jumped in and told her she needed to stop.”
Dr. “Your Uterus Just Might Not Work, Ma’am”
The Waiver of Liability Threat
The “You Want Your Baby to Be Born With Cerebral Palsy, Don’t You?” Threat
The “You’re Out of Time, Ma’am” Threat
The “I Called Every Doctor Plus All of the Doctors at the Nearby Hospital” Threat
“I reminded him of all we knew about these scare tactics, and that we could see the fetal heart monitor for ourselves. There was absolutely no reason to be concerned about the baby at that point. The only problem with the baby was that his mother was being forced to fight a legal battle during her labor.”
Enter Jonas, Gina’s Toddler
[Hugs and tears ensue]
John came back with surprising news:
“The doctor had finally cracked, admitting to John that Baby’s heart tones weren’t worrisome, and said that he’d leave me alone to keep laboring as long as I promised to let them intervene if anything did become worrisome. I couldn’t believe it. I was so relieved, but so still so scared at the same time. John had found a way to make the doctor understand how important the VBAC was to me, but at the same time I wasn’t trying to be a martyr. He managed to convince the doctor that it wasn’t some personal attack on him, and that what I needed more than anything was for everyone to stop putting such an excruciating amount of stress on me so I could just do my thing. Somehow, John’s words worked, and the doctor softened.
John brought the doctor in, and he tried to make up with me. I cried my eyes out when I tried to explain to him how important it was that I didn’t leave that hospital with another uterine scar wondering what could have been if only I’d had a little more time. I promised him that I would be open to the cesarean if it became obvious that was the only choice. I made him understand that I had no intention of hurting myself or my baby, but there was no way I could submit to a surgery that wasn’t medically necessary at that point. Then, he left me alone to get back to business. He was obviously still annoyed with me, but I think John helped him perhaps feel a slight bit of empathy for me too.”
Kelly, Gina’s Delightfully Distracting Friend
Kathryn, The Relaxer
The Anterior Lip
The Medical Entourage (Lights! No Cameras! ACTION!)
Jules breathes air at 10:01 p.m., 38 hours after his mom started laboring!
After you read Gina’s story here, please keep in mind that there are lots of critics out there who would say she is:
Reckless and into “extreme birthing” (because she is)
Selfish, obnoxious and pathologically narcissistic (and)
Uneducated about the dangers of vaginal birth, especially after a C-section (and so she)
Stupidly wishes to heal her narcissistic wounds by placing the experience of vaginal birth before the safety of her baby.
Are you one of those critics? Why don’t you go tell Gina to her face? You can find her here.
Here’s how I read it:
I am healthy.
My baby is healthy.
Even your technology validates this.
Thanks for the nice pain relief.
If I had known you would all go freaking bananas, I would not have come here in the first place.